My Identity is safe
I was coming home from the club this weekend and was dropped home by Jerry at about 2:30 in the night. It was snowing quite heavily and I was just a tad unsteady from the apple martinis I had had earlier. I remember taking my wallet out of his car as I was getting out. I had my gloves, cap, and an extra jacket in my hand along with my wallet and keys. I took the 20 odd steps from the car until I reach the front door of my apartment. I went in and since my head was spinning just a little bit I decided to go straight to bed.
I woke up later in the day only to find that my wallet is nowhere to be found. I looked high and low and after a lot of searching decided that it must be in the snow somewhere. I asked Jerry to check his car just in case and concluded after a day of searching over the same places again and again that it must have fallen off in the snow. Now, my apartment has obviously cleared the snow the first thing in the morning and so when I went out and looked it was either not there or hidden in some heap of snow somewhere closeby. I looked at the weather forecast for the next few days and having no hope of the snow melting I call the credit card companies and cancel my cards and order new ones. So now I am waiting with no credit cards in hand. The only thing that I didn’t have in my wallet was my ID (drivers license) which I had taken out for going to the club and was in my back pocket. Now, I wait with a lot of cash stuffed into my alternate wallet. Life without credit cards is just so boring. I don’t want to buy anything major until I get my card. Not that I don’t want to spend my cash, its just the credit cards have a way of neatly documenting your expenses for the month and I consider cash as undocumented expenses. Does my need to document and file stuff have anything to do with being gay? Is this an attempt at gaining control over an enviroment that you dont have control over? I think it would be worthy to mention that I never used to drink alcohol until a year back since I was always afraid that I might lose control and tell someone that I was gay. Such was my need to not let anyone know that I have never tried alcohol until I was 25. It was only after I decided that my coming out was now a certainity that I even tried alcohol. I always told myself that I didnt drink alcohol because it was not me and it was not an Indian thing to do. I told myself a 100 things but deep inside I always knew that there was only one reason. Control. Rather, the fear of losing control.
I haven’t done my library card, AAA, insurance etc yet since I am hoping that some kind soul will find it and give it back to me. Unfortunately the snow is not showing any signs of melting. In fact it has simply been accumulating even more since then. I have to say that at this moment, I hate snow.
Moving on to less depressing topics, my fishes have babies again! I still have two heavily pregnant guppies and one platy at home and have cordoned them off from the rest of the fishes in the tank. The guppies aren’t really much of a new thing for me now. The first batch which is now 4 months old is almost half the size of an adult now and starting to show signs of colour. I have had about 4 or 5 batches after that which are all now in two categories, the bigger babies and the smaller babies. The platy however has been pregnant for the first time since I got them over 5 months back. I am looking forward to that event. I just hope that I don’t have a fat platy instead of a pregnant platy. The ones born today, 8 of which I was able to separate were guppies born to an unknown mother.
I had to wake up really early today. My teeth are doing pretty well apparently as mentioned by my dentist today morning. This is the first December in three years that I won’t be getting any work done on my teeth. The past two years, I was supposed to have these micro cavities that they were preemptively being cleaned out and cost me money that I had no choice but to spend. Oh and speaking of dentists, I remember the first time my hygienist told me that I have beautiful teeth. I felt so proud of my teeth. But having heard that many times over the last three years, I have begun to feel that it is a routine thing to say in dental hygiene circles. Is this really true?
I have started to get recommendations on seeing gay themed movies from my friends. Two of the recommendations are “A Touch of Pink” and “Priscilla, Queen of the Desert”. There is also this whole thing going on these days about “Brokeback mountain” being nominated for so many awards that CNN has an exclusive link to the Top 10 gay movie moments today. Check it out if you can. (Click here)
Thoughts of the moment:
Wallet, my wallet! Where art Thou! My heart bleeds for but a glance of you. Appearing in front of me when I shut tight my eyes, but fading when the hope of seeing you opens them bright.
And of course, “Stop snowing! Damn it!
I woke up later in the day only to find that my wallet is nowhere to be found. I looked high and low and after a lot of searching decided that it must be in the snow somewhere. I asked Jerry to check his car just in case and concluded after a day of searching over the same places again and again that it must have fallen off in the snow. Now, my apartment has obviously cleared the snow the first thing in the morning and so when I went out and looked it was either not there or hidden in some heap of snow somewhere closeby. I looked at the weather forecast for the next few days and having no hope of the snow melting I call the credit card companies and cancel my cards and order new ones. So now I am waiting with no credit cards in hand. The only thing that I didn’t have in my wallet was my ID (drivers license) which I had taken out for going to the club and was in my back pocket. Now, I wait with a lot of cash stuffed into my alternate wallet. Life without credit cards is just so boring. I don’t want to buy anything major until I get my card. Not that I don’t want to spend my cash, its just the credit cards have a way of neatly documenting your expenses for the month and I consider cash as undocumented expenses. Does my need to document and file stuff have anything to do with being gay? Is this an attempt at gaining control over an enviroment that you dont have control over? I think it would be worthy to mention that I never used to drink alcohol until a year back since I was always afraid that I might lose control and tell someone that I was gay. Such was my need to not let anyone know that I have never tried alcohol until I was 25. It was only after I decided that my coming out was now a certainity that I even tried alcohol. I always told myself that I didnt drink alcohol because it was not me and it was not an Indian thing to do. I told myself a 100 things but deep inside I always knew that there was only one reason. Control. Rather, the fear of losing control.
I haven’t done my library card, AAA, insurance etc yet since I am hoping that some kind soul will find it and give it back to me. Unfortunately the snow is not showing any signs of melting. In fact it has simply been accumulating even more since then. I have to say that at this moment, I hate snow.
Moving on to less depressing topics, my fishes have babies again! I still have two heavily pregnant guppies and one platy at home and have cordoned them off from the rest of the fishes in the tank. The guppies aren’t really much of a new thing for me now. The first batch which is now 4 months old is almost half the size of an adult now and starting to show signs of colour. I have had about 4 or 5 batches after that which are all now in two categories, the bigger babies and the smaller babies. The platy however has been pregnant for the first time since I got them over 5 months back. I am looking forward to that event. I just hope that I don’t have a fat platy instead of a pregnant platy. The ones born today, 8 of which I was able to separate were guppies born to an unknown mother.
I had to wake up really early today. My teeth are doing pretty well apparently as mentioned by my dentist today morning. This is the first December in three years that I won’t be getting any work done on my teeth. The past two years, I was supposed to have these micro cavities that they were preemptively being cleaned out and cost me money that I had no choice but to spend. Oh and speaking of dentists, I remember the first time my hygienist told me that I have beautiful teeth. I felt so proud of my teeth. But having heard that many times over the last three years, I have begun to feel that it is a routine thing to say in dental hygiene circles. Is this really true?
I have started to get recommendations on seeing gay themed movies from my friends. Two of the recommendations are “A Touch of Pink” and “Priscilla, Queen of the Desert”. There is also this whole thing going on these days about “Brokeback mountain” being nominated for so many awards that CNN has an exclusive link to the Top 10 gay movie moments today. Check it out if you can. (Click here)
Thoughts of the moment:
Wallet, my wallet! Where art Thou! My heart bleeds for but a glance of you. Appearing in front of me when I shut tight my eyes, but fading when the hope of seeing you opens them bright.
And of course, “Stop snowing! Damn it!
posted by Dunce Happy at 2:38 PM
4 Comments:
You drank apple martinis??? YAY!!!
AS for gay themed movies; I recommend "Bedrooms and Hallways" and "Presque Rien (Come Undone)"
I might not have mentioned this before but apple martinis are my absolute favourite drink. I have to say that I was quite fascinated by the fact that you had named your blogsite after it. One martini is enough to start me off on a good buzz and the second to get me wasted. I normally dont finish the second one so that I will be able to dance. I dont care for the taste of alcohol so much and somehow Vodka and gin are the two things that I can stand as long as there is something else in the drink to supress the taste vaguely. Normally something fruity. :) yeah. I'm really queeny when it comes to my drinks; thats why I always rave about Pina Coladas and Chichis.
Knowing what movies to see is fine but where do you go to rent these movies? Blockbuster or other general rental stores would have them?
Netflix rules!!
My Blockbuster in Boston had it. But then again, I lived next door to Brookline Cinemasmith..one of the best movie places around in the North East.
Hm...i'll let you know when i check it out. maybe i will soon.
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